Laugh it Off

Why does everybody take sex so damn seriously? The reason I like sex is because it’s fun! And what is the ultimate expression of having fun? Laughing! Yet, laughing during sex is not usually taken lightly, nor is it reciprocated.

I think this is because people get embarrassed if it is pointed out that they are in an awkward physical situation. When you’re getting down and dirty, the expression on your face is not really something you can control. During heightened moments of sexual ecstasy, you may actually look like you’re in pain, or suffocating or constipated. You’re all flushed and sweaty and your hair is sticking out every which way. There’s probably some flesh visible that isn’t normally. But most likely your partner won’t give a good goddamn if you look funny, cause he/she is concentrating on how awesome that fee– oh yeah, right there!

But if you let out a little laugh, it could act like a lightswitch being flicked on. Your lover suddenly gets self conscious- was my O face super goofy looking? Did he realize that I didn’t shave my bikini line? When you’re caught up in the moment, these things don’t matter. But laughing seems to cause insecurities to surface.

I’m here to say: get over it! I’m not laughing at you- I’m laughing with you! Ladies, you know when some sex position causes a little air to get up in your pussy, and then you move and your vag makes a fart sound? Laugh! There is seriously no other option in that situation. If you fall off the bed? Hilarious! You’re getting your toes licked for the first time? You’re damn right it fucking tickles! How can you help but to giggle?

I’ve had lovers get seriously offended when I laughed in bed. Notably, I was hooking up with a guy I seriously had the hots for, and the sex was usually really great. He’d already come, but wanted to go for it again, and he put on a second condom. His dick was a little softer the second time around, and we didn’t have lube, so he was having a bit of a hard time getting it in me. I tried to help, but he wanted to do it himself. Instead of just lying there awkwardly, waiting, my instinct was to giggle a little. When he slipped out again, I laughed again.

Sadly, he took offense to this and got really mad, growling, “Why are you laughing? This is frustrating!” He pulled off the rubber and declared that he was going to sleep. I was shocked and a little crushed by his reaction, and in retrospect I don’t know why I laughed; it just seemed appropriate for me to do. (For the record, in the morning it was all forgotten and we had great sex again.)

My best dude friend, Rod, told me a similar story. His now-girlfriend had been his crush since third grade. This one time, when they first started hooking up (as adults, of course), she was giving him a blow job. She looked up adoringly at his face (something that guys really like to see while receiving head), and Rod had a moment of feeling like the luckiest man on earth. There was this beautiful woman that he’d been into his whole life right between his legs: pure bliss! He was happy, so he laughed. Which prompted the girl to immediately stop and feel hurt, asking, “What’s so funny?”

“No, don’t stop, I’m happy, baby!”

So, to sum it up:
SEX=FUN=HAPPY=LAUGHING=OK!